Key Takeaways
- Big goals fail because they are too abstract for your daily energy.
- A real plan reduces friction, it doesn't just list desires.
- AI works best when it suggests smaller steps than your ego would choose.
Big goals often don’t fail because you “don’t want it enough.” They fail because the goal stays too big for the day you’re actually living.
What works better is boring (and powerful): a tiny next step you can do even on a messy day.
The real job of a plan
A plan isn’t meant to impress you. It’s meant to reduce friction. When a goal is clear and the next step is small, your brain doesn’t need a motivational surge to start.
“A plan isn’t meant to impress you. It’s meant to reduce friction.”
A simple breakdown method
Take any big goal and run this sequence:
- Name the outcome (one sentence).
- Define “done” (a measurable finish line).
- Choose the smallest weekly step you could keep even on low energy.
- Choose the smallest daily step that earns the identity you want.
Example:
- Outcome: “I want to get fit.”
- Done: “I can do 10 push-ups and a 20-minute jog without stopping.”
- Weekly step: “Two short sessions.”
- Daily step: “Five minutes after brushing my teeth.”
Where AI actually helps
AI is most useful when it:
- asks clarifying questions you’d otherwise avoid
- suggests smaller steps than your ego would choose
- helps you adjust when life interrupts
If you like the “systems, not willpower” framing, this essay is a good reference point: How to Use AI Systems to Actually Achieve Your Goals.
The Nudge approach (gentle, specific, repeatable)
Nudge is built around three principles:
- Small commitments beat dramatic promises.
- Feedback should feel safe.
- Progress should reduce guilt, not create it.
A tiny step you can try today
Pick one goal and answer:
“What would count as progress in 5 minutes?”
Do that. Then stop. You’re not trying to win the day. You’re trying to build trust with yourself.